shadows and secrets

you’ve said this before, you know

with pretty much the same look in your eyes

and if that was all a lie

then tell me how can i

believe it will be different this time

A Conversation on Chivalry

Opening Speaker: Chivalry is over rated and convenient.

Participant 1: For whom is it convenient? Chivalry is a choice. The choice to do the right things, for the right reasons, at the right times. If not, then it’s not chivalry; it’s probably a superficial act to impress!

OS: To not practice it is also a choice. The choice to believe in equality. Chivalry isn’t right. The choice to like or hate it is right.

P1: What else does choice mean, OS? Obviously, it’s one’s choice not to practice it or otherwise.
Btw, i really would like to know if YOU believe in the very concept of being chivalrous?

OS: You used the word ‘right’ so many times with regards to things or reasons. Anyway I don’t believe in chivalry 🙂

Participant 2: I don’t get chivalry, we should be respectful and mindful of everyone. I mean if some guy bumps into u we say sala BC… its just not nice… lets just have good manners and leave chivalry to the Downtown Abbey guys

OS: Chivalry should not be confused with courtesy. Yes we should respect and be mindful of everyone we interact with but I don’t think it’s fair to go beyond our means or way for someone especially if external factors aren’t compromising safety.

P2: yea m not ruining my jacket so someone shouldnt step over a puddle… side se jao 😛

Participant 3: Weird. Being as chivalrous as possible is my high. I wish the whole world, both men and women, would be more chivalrous. As long as you protect those weaker than you, in kindness and not out of some weird sense of duty, chivalry is what you are practicing. It’s about courage and honor, courtesy and justice. It isn’t something you can or cannot believe in. It is something that either comes naturally to you, you aspire towards, or you avoid. I think it’s noble.
And it’s anything but convenient. lol.

OS: P3, Thank you for that. As far as courtesy, courage and justice are concerned I agree. However, I do feel the modern interpretation of it is sometimes unfair. I think I practice chivalry in the traditional sense but i’d rather avoid it’s modern interpretation. If equality exists among two individuals I fail to understand why one of them is ‘duty bound’ or expected to be taking care of the other person especially when external factors like safety etc aren’t a concern. I’d rather have equality in my personal equations and I really wouldn’t want to be a guardian to someone who clearly doesn’t need it.

P3: In life, everyone is going to be weaker or stronger than you at some level. It depends on what level your interaction is happening, I believe. Of course its application (chivalry’s i.e.) would be different today than at the time of its inception, but that’s because the social set up at the time of origin was a violent and dangerous one, where knights were one of the strongest and women, amongst the weakest. But today, this is not necessarily true. Yes, if it’s late at night, and you’re in India, you are at a position of strength compared to any female friends you might have with you and chivalry might be expected of you, only on the basis of your being male, but to assume that is the be all and end all of chivalry is wrong. There may be times when you come across a lost child, or an injured dog or even a male colleague who is utterly lost. Or when you’re dealing with the help, or a waiter at a restaurant, or a confused elderly gentleman on the subway. 

I think Chivalry, in fact, is all about strength. If you know you are stronger than those around you, then as long as you do everything in your power to protect them, without expecting rewards or favors in return, you are being chivalrous. Those that say that it’s unfair because women always receive the benefit are buying into the notion that a woman is always weaker than a man, regardless of surroundings or circumstance, and as dismaying as it may be, the solution is not to shun chivalry, but to practice it properly, so that even those who denounce it come to receive its favors, and more importantly, because that is the burden of humanity on its path to civilization.

OS: *sips on water*…Okay!
I have a problem with it due to it’s very gendered connotations. Now, I’m not going to get into specifics of what I do which actually does resonate with your comment. However I wouldn’t compromise on equality specifically when the circumstances do not put me in a position of strength. ..courtesy would mean opening the door for someone regardless of their gender or vacating a seat for someone who clearly looks tired, with a child .. paying the bill, again without bringing gender into the equation, because I might absolutely adore the person, maybe in a position of more financial strength However I wouldn’t want to pay for someone just because according to gender stereotypes, I am supposed to or rush to open the car door for someone perfectly healthy because I’m supposed to. Assuming there is no position of strength involved in a particular situation, I do not believe in doing something just because that is what some gentleman did for his lady at the next table. In other words, I’d rather not be a position of strength and I’d love to be with someone who’s independent and doesn’t need me to pull off stupid stunts to amuse her yet if there’s ever a situation where I find myself in a position of strength, my belief system, how so ever flawed, will be doing everything that’s expected out of a decent human being.

P3: Yeah, so it is all about your own perception of your own strengths and weaknesses, as well as those of the people you are with. I frequently open doors for people I am with, male or female, because if I can do something that makes life easier for the person I am with, and it costs me less than nothing to do it, then why not? Does it mean I consider myself stronger than them in some way? Why, yes, it does. Often it does anyway. And for the few times where I am certain that I am at a disadvantaged position in terms of strength or capability, then what better opportunity to repay them for the chivalry I believe their advantageous position will inspire them to than by doing something as simple as opening a door, or fetching a glass of water, etc..

Waking Wendy – I

The storm colored sky stretched out into eternity, as two lone figures stood beneath it, the only sound above the waves of the distant ocean being that of the wind whipping the edges of their long coats against the rustling uncut grass.

“When will things change?” asked the girl in gray.

The boy shook his head, letting multicolored drops of rain fall about them, “When you wake up.”

Her wide eyed gaze sought out the distant horizon, full of only the unknown. “Are you sure?”, she asked, biting her lip.

“Yes”, he smiled, before leaning closer, “Wake up, Wendy..”

~~~

The building wasn’t that tall, but four floors is still high enough to kill. Especially when you add in the 2 feet of the railing and the ledge, said the slurring voice in her head, and she burst into a fit of giggles, her waif like form shaking in mirth on the railing on which she was precariously perched. The moon looked on disapprovingly, but she drank to his health until even he forgave her, smiling reluctantly at her antics. After all, there is no dark side in the moon, really. And she gave him something to watch.

Alas, the watchmen have seen everything. And the moon is the oldest of them all. He soon tired of her childish games. It was time for something harder. And with magical dawns and falling stars and lighted paths, he led her astray into the wild.

“What do you want from me?”, she cried out suddenly, tired of the changing ground beneath her feet.

“I need you to wake up”, shouted back the moon. “Can’t you see what’s happening around you??”

But she only cried out louder, and shut her eyes tighter. She knew what the Moon wanted to show her, and she did not wish to see.

“Wake up, Wendy”, he whispered, almost lovingly, before withdrawing, once more, into silence.

~~~

He then spent years cleverly shaping her path, leading her slowly towards the palace of a dragon. For, even though there is no dark side in the moon, really; Matter of fact, it’s all dark.

Luckily for her, it wasn’t a particularly old dragon, for those are as weary as they are wise. Of course, this particular one was a little weary and wise himself, but he could not help it; all dragons must be.

“Why have you come here?”, asked the Dragon in his menacing voice, towering over the girl who had long shed her gray robes for black. “I’ve always wanted to meet a Dragon” she said, reverentially. “But, how did you know where to find me?”, asked the Dragon, surprised. “I heard your voice across the ocean a hundred years ago”, said the girl, “and I’ve been looking for you ever since”. The dragon studied her incredulously before swooping down and pulling her on to himself. In ecstacy, she watched the sky change colors and the clouds float on besides them, as they flew over towns and castles, showing her the World she had almost stopped believing in. The moon looked on in jealousy, but the girl had eyes only for the dragon.

But the sky had touched her with its ink, long before she had had any choice in the matter. And now, she was forever haunted by the dark. “Why won’t this stop?”, she cried into the dragon’s chest, his wing locked protectively around her.

“You know what you have to do”, he whispered soothingly, wiping the tears falling from her eyes.

“Wake up, Wendy..”

~~

But she was finally happy, and it didn’t seem fair to have to wake up just when things were getting better. She adorned the dragon’s head with flowers, and forbade him from ever speaking of it again. Of course Dragons don’t listen, but she was clever enough to remember that whether good or evil, they are creatures of their word. So she offered an exchange. That was how he got the third part of her fragmented heart. And as they flew higher and higher into the sun, she began to burn. Until the dragon noticed the edges of her hair were on fire, that is.

He immediately plummeted to the ground, crashing into a group of trees in his hurry to get her down to Earth safely. She tumbled off his back into the grass beneath, laughing. “That was amazing!” She raised her arms up, towards the Dragon. “Let’s do that again.” But the Dragon was saddened by her burning cloak, even when he saw glimpses of the red dress she had on underneath her burnt and tattered armor.

They’re only clothes, love, she wanted to say.

But night was falling, and before they knew it, winter was here. The Dragon was often gone for hours hunting, or flying, or doing whatever it is that dragons do. She did not know. All she knew was that when he was gone, she was cold. And she hated bringing it up, because she knew it made him think of the sun. And when he got like that, she didn’t know what he was after. So, she left him alone, and during one particularly frosty spell, she slowly froze into a picturesque statue.

The Dragon didn’t return for months, so he never even found out. In fact, it was quite undragonlike of him to do so in the first place, but he needed the thrill of the hunt a little more than he may ever needed her. It was a simple calculation really.

At least that’s what the village children say. But what do they knew? They’re idiots. Especially the young boys who liked to make faces at her frozen statue as she stood next to a shrine, painfully aware of every passing lifetime. He’ll come back, she whispered to herself fervently, her thoughts icy cold inside her mind.

But he didn’t.. At least not in time. And one night, a few of the boys hopped over the little fence that surrounded her in order to get a better look at her. She managed to slip away from them, only to fall to the ground and shatter into a million pieces. The boys scattered back to their homes, even as she slowly melted in the rays of the rising sun.

The Sun, she remembered fondly, and then closed her eyes, sliding down into a passing river that was making its way towards the sea. The Sea where the Dragon went hunting… She sat up at once, all the pieces of her focusing themselves into who she needed to be.

“Why don’t you look for a wizard, dear? You look like you need one.” called out an old lady from a passing boat.

The girl began to laugh again, and her tattered robes fell off her shoulders, only to reveal a beautiful red gown that now hung loosely from her fragile form. “No ordinary wizard can help me, old mother”, she cried, even as the river tried to soothe her “Can’t you see? I’ve been cursed by a Dragon.” The old woman turned and  hastened the boat away. For everyone knows how ancient the magic of a dragon is. And no one wanted to involve themselves in this tale.

The Dragon found her floundering about in the Sea, surprised to see her oddly rearranged form swimming in the cold winter sea. She raised up her trembling arms, and the dragon lifted her into the air, gently gathering her broken pieces that fell back into the reluctant river. “He’s not going to hurt me, River” she said, so tired that she had begun to slur, “Well, not much. But I’m not that weak!” The Dragon looked at her flowing gown and growled softly at the scent of the village boys about her.

“Why didn’t you come back?”, she finally asked, her voice a trembling whisper. “I never left”, he replied, quietly. She didn’t believe him, but pieces of her began to, and after years and years of icy solitude, it was simply too much to take, and she burst into tears. “What do you want from me?”, she cried.

He growled at her again and transformed into a wizard before her very eyes. She took a wary step back even as he smiled at her, wolfishly.

“You know what you have to do, little girl”, said the Wizard-who-used-to-be-a-Dragon as he moved in closer towards her, somehow so much more menacing than he had ever been as a Dragon.

“What?”, she whispered, her breath warm against his cheek.

He kissed her for a moment, before pulling away and cursing out reluctantly, “Wake up, Wendy.”

To All my Atheist friends..

Ummm. Agnostic here. *laughs uncomfortably* I really sincerely believe that praying to a maybe existing supernatural being constantly is quite ridiculous, especially in the absence of any concrete evidence of his/her existence whatsoever.. But I also don’t think that we have enough proof to stand up and say we’ve figured everything out. There’s a lot of stuff out there that science cannot *yet* explain. And, yes, they could all be waves and radiation and forces we have not discovered, I’m totally down with that. Just as I wouldn’t be surprised to learn we are all living in a simulated world. Or that aliens are observing us.

I guess, what I’m trying to say is.. We know nothing, A.S.

Also, I dunno. There are hardworking people, and then there’s luck. I won’t go so far as to invoke fate. It does make me mighty uncomfortable, right up there with destiny. But, sometimes hard work doesn’t pay, yo. And, sometimes, random things do. And, sometimes, when life is balancing itself out, the good you do comes back to you, just as the bad you do does. And, of course good things happen to bad people, and bad things happen to good. But, that’s as much proof for God not existing, as good things happening to good people and bad things happening to bad people is proof for the existence of God!

Nothing sucks more than organized religion. But, simply because it deceives people into thinking that acting in a certain way to appease a certain deity is the way to get eternal salvation/liberation.

Life, as humans understand it, is a matter of a handful of years. For millions of billions of years before we were born, we existed as space dust and star dust, and for millions and billions of years after we die, that atomic form is what we shall all be scattered into. Who are we to say what consciousness is to an atom? Or whether it’s fair to call that non-life? And, what if in atomic form, every Star is your God? Or what if we are given these 70-100 years to learn how to be good atoms? Or, well, anything really! What proof do we have of *everything*?

We know what we know, and what we know is very little.

The Last of the Anti-Orange Rant [Or why you will never convert me, Modi-ites!]

The problem is this, S. The reasons why we don’t support Modi have been listed out a hundred times above. As others have mentioned, your scary blind devotion to the man is disappointing and frightening.  What we will get into is this: A lot of Muslims were horribly tortured, and died, under his reign. When you […]

#Aggravation

*phone rings for the tenth time*

Me: Who do you want to speak to?

HF: Hello?

Me: Who have you called to speak to?

HF: I got a missed call from this number..

Me: Yes, sir. That was 2 days ago, when we were ordering food.

HF: *silence*

Me: Why have you called?

HF: I don’t know anything. I just know that someone gave me a missed call from this number.

Me: Sir. Yes. You got a call. Two days ago. To  place an order for food. Since then, you have called me a hundred times from this number of yours that is registered under the name of your employer. Can you please tell me why, or stop?

HF: … Oh! Okay! Okay, ma’am! Yes! Okay!

-_-

Freaks.

The Devil’s Advocate

It took me about 16 years to get around to watching this movie. Despite nearly a decade of being obsessed with Keanu Reeves, six years of which I’ve been at law school. Why now? And, what am I supposed to do with this, now?

“Free will. It’s like butterfly wings: once touched, they never get off the ground. No, I only set the stage. You pull your own strings.” – John Milton

What am I going to do? Whatever I want to? But, what do I want to do? Aaargh! It’s all just a God-damned test! All of fuckin’ everything! Damn it!

Why am I questioning my own existence?

Because! Because, because, because! It’s all ’bout free will. What we are, we choose to be. We choose. That changes everything. But, it doesn’t really matter what you choose. Because, we think the ability to make the choices we wish to make makes us free, but in reality, human beings choose the same things for the same reasons. Time after time after time. And we’re all headed in the same direction. And, the Devil was right about us. What if he’s also right about God? How can you choose options without knowing the end towards which you’re working towards? And, what can we know of the end, when we can’t even know the past, or understand the present?

I’m not questioning my existence as much as I’m trying to deal with the fact that I must do whatever I have to in order to reach wherever I want, whenever I want. When I know Nothing. Nothing. 

And, that’s why it’s a test, right? Because you first learn the questions, then look for the answers. And everybody fails. That’s why it’s a ‘damned’ test. Lol. 

Do we really amuse God? Does God even exist? What the hell are we all doing on this forsaken piece of rock, floating around a giant ball of fire, in endless, growing, empty space?!!

What is everything about?

The system isn’t like air because we didn’t invent air. The system is entirely a product of thousands of years of humans expressing their free will. Even when you bow your head before a God, or hijack a plane because you’ve been indoctrinated, it’s because you have free will. You can always choose.

And, I’m not saying that we know what we want. I don’t have a clue. But, more importantly, how are we supposed to know? You can only make educated guesses as to things that you perceive as making you happy, and chase them. But, with every moment, you change, and things are too static. Thoughts, too dynamic. Words, too easy. Feelings, too complicated and unreliable. Dreams are illusions. Point being, there is nothing trustworthy enough to follow, or chase, or want.

What if you strive towards nothing? Living in the moment is one thing, but does that mean that the meth addict in the tiny shack down the dirty alley is happier than someone who plans everything out for their next day, right down to the tie-pin? The “test”, I don’t mean it in a religious sense of the word. Not even spiritual, bless that poor over-hyped word. I mean, objectively, the action of living is a test. And, it’s a test we’re all designed to fail. We’re designed to fail this test as a species. And, as individuals, we take the fall-out society, after society, after society. Just like society suffers for the sins of individuals. And, that’s the messed up part. That, while society is supposed to be for the betterment of human civilization, the real war, every time, is the individual vs the Society within which he exists. Even if they are hallucinations or virtual realities.

But, yes, I agree with you there. As Decartes said, “I think, therefore I exist.”

Lastly, I’m not in Test mode! I loathe being tested, you know that? I hate it. I mean, I get it if there’s something you want from me. By all means, test me to see whether I would work out. But, it’d be nice if you would first ask me whether I would be okay with giving you whatever it is that you wanted, right? Don’t just test me, assuming the rest will work itself out. Free Will. It’s important to me. 

Also, I can’t stop thinking about God, or the Devil. Just like I can’t stop thinking about Good and Evil and Right and War and Death and Innocence and the price of everything, the value of everything. I need to understand everything. I don’t ignore the people around me. But, only because they teach me about all these things. People and their complicated, sinful, joyful lives. Every person is a step closer to the complete view of the World.

What we are, we choose to be. We have every choice imaginable to us. *Everything* is permitted, because nothing is true. Did I already say that? But, it is so so important. You have every choice you can think of; it’s just you to tell yourself doing something is too impossible. Problem is, human kind confuses ends with means. You only have full control over yourself, and how you react to things that befall you. You can’t choose to be happy. But, you can choose to not dwell on the past, or take up a hobby to distract you. You can’t choose to have a loving marriage, but you can choose to marry someone you think you will probably be compatible with/someone you love, and be really nice to them. You can’t choose to die laughing, but you can choose to live laughing, so that death finds you that way, no matter where and when it approaches you.

But, human beings don’t get that. We make wishes, and want happiness, and cry when things don’t go our way. Regardless of the fact that not even a minute fraction of the Universe’s existence ago, we were atomic particles in a gaseous ball of fire a kazillion miles away, and it is just pure, unbelievable Luck that has let us exist in this form – as living breathing organisms with thoughts, memories and the ability to experience things. Everything that happens is good. Because something is better than nothing. And, you have all eternity to be star dust again.

So, my question to your answer stays the same – If everything is about me, then what am I?

What I am is what I choose to be.

(With no clue as to what the basis for my choices should be)

Public Debate: What to do with the Rapers, and can men empathize with women?

Parties to this discussion:

Enraged Citizen: Final Year Law Student in the role of an enraged citizen of the Indian State.

Vengeful Sympathetic Male : Wants the strictest punishment for all rapists.

Angry College Girl: Men cannot empathize with women.

Lawful Citizen: Fears for safety, and is upset with the rampant abuse of law

Legally Bound: Believes the rule of law must prevail.

Virtual Protester: Bordering on Anarchy

(OP) Enraged Citizen: She said she wanted to live. I hate you All. I hate us All. I hope this country burns to the ground now. You can kill each other in the name of religion. Now fucking do it for her. And, Legally Bound, don’t talk to me about responsibility or rebuilding or fixing anything. As a nation, we don’t deserve to exist, you know that? Yes, it is spectacular that India has managed to exist as a democracy, the World’s largest democracy. The world’s largest farce, you mean. We should stop pretending. We don’t deserve any better. Fuck Joker, man, I wish I was Ra’s Al Ghul right now. You know why? Because there is no Batman, and she’s dead, and that 17 year old is dead, and a thousand more will be soon, and it’s all our fault.

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: see now u are talking my language …. get pissed off, get angry , there has to be blood

Enraged Citizen: And, Blood there shall be. I swear it.

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: shit keepin u up all night?

Enraged Citizen: I wouldn’t dare sleep now.

Lawful Citizen: I sincerely hope that justice is done and that now the highest possible punishment that is the death penalty be given to all the rapists involved! May her soul rest in peace and god give courage and peace to victim’s family members!

Vengeful Sympathetic Male:  death penalty is lenient i wanna do the hostel scene with the fuckers, shoud first sodomise them with a hot poker then give them the old pullin out the digits then comes the eye poking out etc etc. she lived for like 10 days after her experience they shouldnt die quick

• Enraged Citizen: God’s a kid with an ant farm. If he couldn’t stop them from raping her, he sure as hell is not going to go about dispensing courage and peace. And, how can Justice be done? You tell me, Lawful_Citizen. What in the World can you possibly do in this case to ensure that justice is done? And, is there anything anyone can do to bring her back? And, what about her friend. he’s gonna be fucking traumatized for the rest of his life. And, can’t you see, it’s not just them that killed her?? People have been dying in such horrific ways for years, and if we had had the courage or the concern to start talking about these things a little earlier, maybe it wouldn’t haev even come to this.
• So, you see, you and I killed her, Lawful_Citizen. What punishment do we deserve now?

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: i wanna go through the horrible experience of watching them get mutilated

Enraged Citizen: not even the most brutal torture can bring her back. Not the most painful punishment is gonna make her boyfriend or her family feel any better. Torturing them, that’s just selfish, and it’s more attention than they deserve. They should just be exiled to outer space. Or the Desert. They’re not even worth killing. And, they’re not the problem. God, I just can’t get over the fact that for 10 days, she’s been fighting this, and she told all of us that she wanted to live. And we couldn’t do anything.

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: we suck!!!!!

Lawful Citizen: Enraged Citizen, we cannot be fatalistic or philosophical about this whole deplorable incident and my point is that something urgently needs to be done to restore some sense of order and that something begins with punishing the perpetrators of this heinous act..I am not saying or implying that it would be adequate or that it would bring back the victim but it would be something close to justice, however far actually it might be from it…society needs to know that such heinous and sordid incidents will not be tolerated by us as a whole!

Angry Young Lady: Not until 6 men rape one man will the men in this country learn a lesson. Let them fear their lives the way we fear ours. Let them stand on this side of the fence once. Just once. Then and only then should they be entitled to an opinion. R.I.P superwoman. You’re a fighter. Respect.

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: hey i resent that comment. why do u think i cannot empathize just cause i am a dude.

Lawful citizen: Ditto

Angry Young Lady: Empathy (n.) – Understanding what someone else is feeling because you have experienced it yourself or can put yourself in their shoes.

Enraged citizen: No, let’s not fight amongst each other. Please. Not tonight, alright?? Vengeful_Sympathetic_Male, all Angry_Young_Lady is trying to say is that there is a rape culture that is so pervasive, living a normal life has become impossible in this country if you are a woman. Imagine what it would feel like if you are always at war, that some unidentified person can just come and pick you up and take you away if you don’t keep your eyes open wide enough, phone in hand while walking in a empty locality, edge away from cars that slow down at footpaths. You guys, it’s become physically exhaustible and intolerable. And, yes, you can empathize, and I’m so glad you do, because we need every single ally we can all get, but the fact remains that a lot of men don’t want to see women raped, yet half of them still talk in terms of protecting a lady’s modesty instead of giving her her rights. All Angry_young_Lady is trying to say, in this moment of anger, is that men don’t understand why we want this so badly.

Specter M: We shouldn’t let go of the anger. Channel it. Get things done and fast. [But what is to be done? How is it to be done?] Her death shouldn’t be in vain. The shit has hit the fan you guys!!! The whole country should be in flames now. Another story goes into the archives. Another testimony to the apathy, the lack of courage. Another girl succumbed. Another ‘law’. Another (lost) ’cause’. Just another f***ing day …  What has the world come to? How did it get so messed up? What happened? Where did we go wrong? Who has the answers? Anyone? Anyone?

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: Angry Young Lady, i can imagine fear cause it is something everyone can feel, fear has nothing to do with ur gender . besides i am in no mood to get into an argument about that. i believe i can freely make any comment i fucking please cause i am only expressing my anger

Angry young Lady: You can sympathize all you want. But you will never be able to empathize with a rape survivor. You know why? Because you can never imagine yourself to be in her position. Not even in your wildest dreams. You can walk out on the road at anytime of the day or night, ask strangers for a lift when in need, wear whatever you wish, drink as much as you like and NOT FEAR FOR YOUR LIFE!

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: oh get off ur feminist horse and get with the program, this is a problem that we have to face as a society not just women

Angry Young Lady: You classify a woman expressing her anger against men as a feminist and in the same breath expect to “empathize” with one that has been raped? Hahaha. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not blaming you for anything or accusing you for any omissions. I’m simply saying that you cannot feel what a woman can feel with regard to this incident. And that’s a fact. Its like we can sympathize with a guy who gets kicked on his balls, but we can never really feel his pain. Bad analogy, but similar principle.

Enraged Citizen: I think she was responding more to Lawful_Citizen’s comment about hanging them than yours. Please, niggers, the British managed to separate the Hindus and Muslims, let’s not let our own government divide us into women and men. Seriously, it is not a Man vs Woman issue. Angry_young_lady, though I fully empathize with your anger, is it not true that women also hold this view? Our women scientists, our women ministers, aunties sitting at home, and women who frequently serve as accomplices to rapes; these women actually hold the view that in this World, a woman cannot own a vagina (Movie reference). The point is there is a fence, but it does not stand between men and women; it stands between those with a closed off mentality that are threatened by female sexuality, and those that welcome such a liberation. And, both men and women stand on both sides. VSM may not have had to fear for his own life or safety, but any man who belongs to this side of the fence has spent enough time dealing with these issues through his life. Let’s not alienate those who agree our rights are more important than just god-damned modesty. There are few enough of us as there are!

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: u tell her Enraged_Citizen, ……….hey i am on ur side of the issue, i just want to be able to voice my opinion too ,y should it matter if i have a penis……penis shmeenis we are all people here!!!

Enraged Citizen: Nice analogy, though. That does put things into perspective. And proves both your points, VSM and AYL! We can still empathize with men, and they can empathize with us, even if we can’t feel the same things or imagine what they feel like, and vice versa.

Angry young Lady: Its absolutely not a man v. woman issue. And I’m not making it out to be, either. My god. Vengeful_Sympathetic_Male, please calm down. And please just once read up the difference between empathy and sympathy. You cannot empathize with her, is all I’m saying. And that doesn’t make you bad or anything. Its just how the society is. Men almost don’t get raped at all. Period. Also, my comment wasn’t directed to you or your friend. My comment was directed to the men in the country who “need to learn a lesson”. You’re entitled to all the opinions in the world. Freedom of speech FTW!

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: also maybe i used the wrong word instead of empathy maybe i should have used the word compassion. sorry @nalini if my vocabulary fails me at times. see we were thinking the same thing

Angry Young Lady: And we’re angry at the same people.

Enraged citizen: ❤ … Yuck, these facebook hearts are damn gay. (no offense to homosexual individuals)

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: absolutely so who is up for slaughtering the fuckers not for justice or anythin but just cause we are angry. call me sadistic but i would like it very much

Angry young Lady: Enraged_Citizen, also a little inappropriate in a discussion where rapes, women’s rights, freedom of speech, deteriorating state of the country, fuckall politicians etc are being discussed, don’t you think?

Enraged Citizen: I applojjize. May I withdraw my statement? 😐

Vengeful Sympathetic Male: damn i gotta catch a flight to namma bengaluru, would totally love to stay and curse on them assholes for a while

Enraged citizen: S’okay. You have a safe flight, bruv. The Rage is Relentless. We’re not going anywhere.

Virtual Protester: Something urgently needs to be done to restore some sense of order? I have no idea what that is even supposed to mean. Seriously. I think it’s high time we get rid of that inner conflict within us between what’s idealist and what’s realistic. What is idealistic IS realistic. If you don’t live your life like that every day then be ready to make compromises all throughout your life. Please don’t take any of this seriously, but if it applies please do.

Enraged Citizen: And what is expected is not even idealistic… It is only realistic that the State provide you with security regardless of your gender, or the time..

Lawful Citizen: plz desist from quoting out of context…read comment in entirety & context in which it is made!

Enraged Citizen: And, when I say “provide you with security”, I mean a secure neighborhood and country, where crimes are the anomalies, not the norm. What we have now is rampant abuse of the law and an inefficient bureaucratic set-up that works for no one but those who are corrupt and apathetic.

Lawful citizen: I meant that there would be order through better provision for security of our citizens and prevalence of rule of law!

Virtual Protester: I thought that you were referring to the protesters. Either way, I still meant that. And fuck that, go buy yourself some tasers/knives/pepper spray from brigade road. I know a guy who knows a guy. Protect yourself till we figure out this rule of law thing.

Lawful Citizen: Try and redirect your anger or whatever it is towards the govt and police or whoever is responsible for safety of citizens!

Late Entrant Girl: Monsters! Monsters! Monsters!! Ugh. Burn in hell! And yes let’s go get us some knives and tasers. 😐

Horrified Citizen: its horrific thats all i can say

Voice of Reason: Things will get better. Do not lose hope. We’ve been living in a world far worse for far longer, it’s events like these which open our eyes, rip us out of our cocoons and make us realize that humanity is scum. Be mad, rage, talk, think, influence attitudes around you as much as you can. It is the miniscule, seemingly insignificant stuff which brings about change, when done over and over again.

Legally Bound: We all feel pain, We are all hurt, We are angry. It tells us that we are human. As a nation we have passed through a cathartic event, which didn’t show us something new it just opened our eyes to a reality that had been swept under the carpet. The brutality of her death, finally woke people up to the fact that in Independent India women are not thought of as full citizens. However, this is not the fault of India or the ideal of India or even the reality of India envisioned by the great men and women of her past. You are right that if we do not ensure that the Constitution and its basic rights are not available to all citizens of India, the Country will burn. It is inevitable. But i still say it is not the Country or its laws which are failing it is the people. We the people need to evolve and understand freedom and take steps and even sacrifice to change the minds of people who have themselves been oppressed for aeons. What happened to her showed us how far we have fallen. Let us use our pain and anger to create a better society where men and women are equals not only law but in practice. Maybe, i am idealistic but i do think that social change needs to begin inside us and burning people or things will certainly not change people’s minds. I am sure women don’t want to be feared. What sort of society is that.

Enraged Citizen: Women don’t care what it takes, Legally_Bound. And if that is what it takes, that is how it shall be. If there is any other way, of course we would prefer that. We all have “boyfriends” and “husbands”, to borrow the language of the day. heh.

Facebook Debate: What do Rapists deserve?

India Plans to Shame Rapists, Even as Its Cops Shame Rape Victims to Suicide

S: Bastards should be strung up and hung on the streets so every one can see.

M: Sigh. Fortunately or unfortunately, we must advance and not regress, even when it comes to punishment… Still, sometimes I wonder. Anyway, you can’t hang mentalities. Especially not nation-wide mentalities..

S:  I think it will be progress if we can reduce the number of rapes…. ergo…castration and public lynching

M: *grins* Then, I guess rapists should be glad you’re not standing for office. …But, seriously, the way to reduce these crimes is not through fear; that’ll only make misogyny levels rise. What we need is education at a primary level that imparts more moral and sexual education than “boys and girls should not sit together” in class.

S: thats cool and all but as long as these assholes get away with light sentences there is no hope, imagine one of those delhi fuckers is gonna be out of jail in less than a year just cause he is a couple of months shy of his 18th birthday. and yes i wish i could get elected to some sort of office where i get to lay some HOSTEL type torture on them rapists

M: The law is (supposed to be) the codification of the most logical and rational principles of human behavior; It cannot successfully fix problems that arise at a societal level, but only rein them in while society does the rest. We are society. If India doesn’t come up with a solution, and fast, it’s only a matter of time before Vigilante justice takes over.. And, as bad as that might be, can you blame me if I think it might actually do some good? We have an unarmed citizenry constantly brutalized by armed criminal miscreants and apathetic State machinery. At least the Vigilantes will be of the people, by the people, for the people.

S: yuh The Revolution is coming !!!!! and screw our outdated legal system which was meant for a different time , which is the main reason why i didnt go ahead and practice

M: The Revolution is here!  (And, yes, the legal system is damn fucked up.. But, ignoring it isn’t going to make it any better! -_-)

S: and this is no democracy where the 5-0 (popo) is happily off committing rapes and our political figures are all criminals themselves making chauvinist remarks on national tV

M: Exactly why I said that it’s a deep rooted mentality that we’re dealing with rather than just a few anti-social elements! The rapists *are* the social elements of the day! And, the only thing that can fix that is education. For starters, I think we need to stop some corruption so that we can use that money to increase pay-scales of teachers and police officers. That’s the only way that these two forces will adequately represent the interests of all facets of society, and not just of the rich and powerful who can not only buy them, but sexually assault their daughters, and shoot them dead if they dare raise their own voices.

S: ONE DAY, ONE fucking DAY everyone will get whats coming to them

M: 😦 I hope so, S-san. I truly do…

Is the Pen always mightier than the Sword?

Lady S: What is mightier? The pen or the sword?

Sir M: Depends on the wielder, I would say. For instance, if it were you, I would be wary even if –

Lady S: That’s not what I mean, and you know it! Don’t jest, Ser! Tell me this very instance-

Sir M: Alright, alright.

Lady S: With the sword, it is actions and deeds that one is committing. However, the area of effect is limited. On the other hand, while a pen cannot fight by itself, it can be used to move a million swords in a million hands. One cannot be everywhere. But, if our cries are not echoed loud enough, is the sound still mightier than the blow?

Sir M: What would you have me say, Lady S? It seems as though your mind is made up.

Lady S: My mind is not made up! If it were so, I would know what to do, would I not?

Sir M: Take up the sword then, my Lady.

Lady S: …

Sir M: That is what you want to hear.

Lady S: What do you have to say, honestly?

Sir M: I stand by what I first said, my Lady. It all depends on the wielder. A pen is no use in the hands of an illiterate peasant, and what would a writer make of a sword? Everything has to be where it is.

Lady S: Well said, Ser. Well said.