What I Want

I want to write about other things, happier things, things that don’t get stronger the weaker I get.

I want to laugh freely, feel the wind in my hair, truly live under the infinite night sky.

I want to dream of beautiful things, and wake up to happiness.

I want to stop waiting for brimstone and hellfire.

I want to be waited for, appreciated, wanted.

I want to believe in things and people.

I want to forget the bad memories.

I want to be more than this.

I want to be ecstatic.

And

I always

do what I want.

Whose coming do you await? [‘Kiska Rasta Dekhe” – English Translation]

Kiska Rasta Dekhe
Whose arrival do you wait for?

– Kishore Kumar

Kiska Rasta Dekhe
Whom are you awaiting?
Ae Dil Ae Saudaai
Oh, heart; oh, lunatic.
Meelon Hai Khamoshi
For miles around, there is silence
Barson Hai Tanhaai
and for ages, loneliness
Bhuli Duniya Kabhi Ki Tujhe Bhi Mujhe Bhi
The World has long forgotten you, as well as me
Phir Kyon Aankh Bhar Aai
Then why do the eyes tear up?
O Kiska Rasta Dekhe…
O, whose coming do you watch for?
Ae Dil Ae Saudaai
Oh, heart; oh, lunatic.

Koi Bhi Saaya Nahin Raahon Mein
There is no shadow whatsoever on these paths
Koi Bhi Aayega Na Baahon Mein
There’s no one to rush into these arms
Tere Liye Mere Liye Koi Nahin Rone Waala Ho
For you, for me, no one is going to cry
Jhuta Bhi Naata Nahin Chaahon Mein
A false relationship doesn’t even exist in my desires
Tu Hi Kyon Dubaa Rahey Aahon Mein
Why then are you immersed in your sighs?
Koi Kisi Sang Marey Aisa Nahin Hone Waala
That someone actually dies alongside someone else, that isn’t going to happen.
Koi Nahin Jo Yunhi Jahaan Mein Baante Peer Paraee
There is no one who simply, in this world, shares and understands the pain of others.
Ho Kiska Rasta Dekhe…
Whose coming do you watch for?
Ae Dil Ae Saudaai
Oh, heart; oh, lunatic.

Tujhe Kya Beeti Hui Raaton Se
What do you care of the nights that have passed?
Mujhe Kya Khoyi Hui Baaton Se
What do I care of conversations that are lost?
Sej Nahin Chita Sahi Jo Bhi Miley Sona Hoga Ho
If not a bed of roses, a pyre will do. Whatever we get, we must sleep in
Gai Jo Dori Chhuti Haathon Se O
Once the thread has slipped from our hands
Lena Kya Chhute Hue Saathon Se
What have we to do with broken relationships?
Khushi Jahaan Maangi Tuney Wahin Mujhe Rona Hoga
Where you asked for happiness, that’s where I shall have to cry
Na Koi Tera Na Koi Mera Phir Kiski Yaad Aaee
There’s no one who is yours, nor anyone, mine; then who is being remembered?
O Kiska Rasta Dekhe…
Whose coming do you watch for?
Ae Dil Ae Saudaai
Oh, heart; oh, lunatic.