I want to write about other things, happier things, things that don’t get stronger the weaker I get.
I want to laugh freely, feel the wind in my hair, truly live under the infinite night sky.
I want to dream of beautiful things, and wake up to happiness.
I want to stop waiting for brimstone and hellfire.
I want to be waited for, appreciated, wanted.
I want to believe in things and people.
I want to forget the bad memories.
I want to be more than this.
I want to be ecstatic.
And
I always
do what I want.