Avenging Expectations

Dated: Mid 2013

I know that you expect

Songs of vengeance and fire

Clinging complaints of neglect

But, my love, I am tired..


I know you still expect

Accusations of cruelty

But pleading for attention

Has never been my specialty


I could clutch at your hand

and keep asking you why

I could say I still cared

And I could try and cry


But, baby, if you want me gone,

Well then, tell me, who am I?

Who am I to ask to stay?

Baby, who am I to ask why?


And I could chase some fantasy

And hope that half of it comes true

Or maybe find the man of my dreams

Except on nights I dream of you


And in the midst of all your fire

I crave only to burn

Like a torch to some inner darkness

That only I have earned


And I would make my way to you

Come rain-storms or hell-fire

Not for empty words

Only all my form desires


And if you asked me to leave

I would pack my bags and go

Live out forgotten fantasies

Hidden behind some nameless door


Maybe I’d even forget

The sound of your voice

Pretend that when I was leaving

You gave me no choice


And maybe I’d forget you too

Though I hope it isn’t so

Or cry into rainy nights

While he holds my body close


And I cannot help but wonder

Whether his skin, too, would be smooth as ice

And I can’t help but wonder

If any other fire would ever suffice.


You owe me nothing

And I owe nothing to you

And in this nothingness what we choose to give

Is all that must be true


So if lessons and space are what I’ve earned

Tell me, of what shall I complain?

When I would give you my immortality

What price is mortal pain?

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